Confessions of a Christmas Crank

Confessions of a Christmas crank

I recognise this feeling. The mornings are suddenly darker and the heating has just been switched on for the first time since February. The supermarkets are stocking halloween costumes and Radio City 967 have started playing ‘Christmas Party’ adverts. You can’t stop it. Its happening. There is nothing you can do. The………..Holidays are coming, holidays are coming!

I always leave present buying until December mainly because anything I buy before then goes missing. Does that happen to you? The lovely gift your mums gonna love goes in a drawer or cupboard at home never to be seen again. So gift buying doesn’t happen just yet.


Do you know what I do first when this christmassy feeling kicks in? Sort the kids Christmas clothes. For as long as we can remember us Scouse mums have taken great pleasure in picking out our children’s outfits for Christmas Day. Paying off these gorgeous colourful ensembles each month desperate to dress our little people up and take that all important picture on Christmas morning. The ones you grow up and look back at thinking ‘Did my mother hate me? What was she thinking?’. We don’t stop there. We pay off boxing day clothes, the all important boxing day tracksuit for the lads. Christmas Eve pyjamas. Its bloody brilliant.

My tree goes up in October, disguised as a Halloween tree! Check out its witchy feet. I throw a huge house party every year and on November 1st the tree gets a Christmas makeover!

The same people attend my annual Christmas party each year. It takes place the first Saturday of November and has done since 2003 the first year I celebrated Christmas in my own house. The Micky Buble album gets whipped out, we order Chinese food and do karaoke in the kitchen till we can’t sing anymore. Its tradition.My mum swears I have always been emotionally invested in Christmas. Getting excited on the first day of school after summer holidays, not for class but because I knew what was coming over the next few months. I can remember going to the Liverpool light switch ons and local pantomimes and it wasn’t long until I became a part of them myself. I have the most wonderful memories of Christmas over the years. Shopping with my mum wrapped up tight in a warm winter coat, hat scarf and gloves. Stopping for food in cosy Olivers Cafe, Central Station. Remember that place?

I loved the theatre family I would acquire during Panto and the late pick ups from rehearsals eating tea in the car so I could go straight to bed when my parents got me home.

As an adult all the best occasions happen in December for me. Many of my family members celebrate their birthdays, my wedding took place December 30th and my first baby was delivered

December 6th. This is everything that means the world to me. Family, Friends, gatherings, celebrations. Everyone you hold dear to you, in one place at least one time, laughing about the drama, sadness and bonkers situations the previous months have brought your way.

I know many believe Christmas should start mid December and not a moment sooner. But if it puts a smile on your face and a spring in your step follow my lead. Ring those friends who make you laugh till you cry this October and invite them round to help you drink the egg nog you made following a dodgy youtube video and serve up Christmas pud. Lash the tree up in November and play that Home Alone Soundtrack dead loud. What are you waiting for? Christmas? x P.S Don’t forget to sort your Panto tickets too! Heres the link to catch me at the family friendly Echo Arena Auditorium opening December 15th running until xmas eve!

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